At Home Sweet Home, Trust is More! Judgment is Less! ❤️

Which is better? Hall Life? Or Life as a Day Scholar?

I BA English | Debating Hour

2nd February 2024

In the Battle Between Homes, which Team do you think, emerged victorious today?

Read on… to find out! 😊

The topic for today’s Friday Debate Hour was –

Which is better? Hall Life? Or Life as a Day Scholar?

Students who rooted for Day Scholar’s Life chorused, ‘Home Sweet Home’ 😊

while

Students who rooted for Hall Life, gave a shout-out for, ‘Home Away from Home’ 😊

Vasan won the toss for their side, ‘Home Away from Home’, and elected to open the spirited attack as part of the first grand debate for the I BA English class today.

Home Away from Home

We have more freedom in the Hall, compared to those of you who stay with your family members, said Xena, kicking off the debate in style.

Home Sweet Home

But we feel totally secure when we are with our parents, countered Gracelin.

Home Away from Home

In the Halls we learn how to be independent, said Jane.

Home Sweet Home

Well, Jane talks about independence, but you see, when our parents say ‘No’, they have a valid reason for it. It’s for our own good, countered Lekhaa.

Home Away from Home

You said that you’ve got security.. But guess what? that’s a false sense of security. When your parents are not around, how will you then make your decisions? Within the bounds imposed on us, we still make sure that we make our decisions for ourselves, early on in life, said Shauna.  

It’s not like we’re abandoned. It’s like a small bubble, through which we prepare ourselves for the real world, for the real life ahead of us, said Keerthana.

Home Sweet Home

I’d like to refute Xena when she said that, you’ve lot more freedom. My parents will still open the gate, if I’m late. But in the Halls, you guys don’t have that freedom. At home, with parents, I can still have my personal space / my own private space, said Megha.

Home Away from Home

I guess I need to oppose Andrea’s point of view. I stay in the Hall. We guys go out as a batch – say 30 of us! Sometimes even our seniors accompany us. We are not alone. Sometimes 30 of us will gather in a room. Only in the women’s Halls we have curfew time, but for that, each one’s privacy is maintained and respected even in the Hall, said Vasan.

Home Sweet Home

Living with your family members gives you that sweet sense of inter-dependence. As young adults I strongly feel that it is important to be interdependent. My parents are with me, and when the fight gets too hard, they support me, and give me guidance, something that you guys miss out on, said Kiruthika.

Home Away from Home

The concept of bubble is highly subjective. Family situations aren’t always the best for everyone all of the time. Even in houses, sometimes four or five of us live in the same room. In the Hall, you get varied perspectives to the same issue, from PG students, PhD Scholars, Wardens, etc. said Shauna.

Home Sweet Home

Shauna’s points are valid. However, I should make a point that, we also, as day scholars, meet with the same kind of people, right from PG Students, PhD Scholars, Wardens, etc.

I want to emphasise on the fact that, there’s something so beautiful about living with one’s family. We get imbibed with the values that are passed down from generation to generation. So you ensure that there’s a bond. You might not get the same sense of values, comfort, love and care in the Hall, said Catherine.

Home Away from Home

Almost 17 or 18 years of the early stages of your life you live with your immediate family members. Don’t you think this long period of time is enough to shape you with values? As a woman in the world, you have a variety of experiences. For that, you’ve got to cherish a strong sense of community – to foster bond more than a sense of security, said Ilfa.

Home Sweet Home

To add to what Catherine said, it’s at this age our family opens to us. Till then, they look upon us only as kids. So the sense of family is very important at this age in life. Even if I were to travel for three hours to study every day, still…. At the end of the day, I prefer to sleep in my own sweet bed at home, said Megha.

Home Away from Home

Based on my personal experience, I would like to say that, my daily shuttle tires me much. I literally don’t have the energy to travel this long on a daily basis. But don’t you think it’s high time we learnt to do things by ourselves. Probably once in a while, we can go and visit our parents, said Pearlina.

Home Sweet Home

Pearlina, if you go back home you’ve got parents to open up. But guess what? I share everything about my day with my parents, and parents teach me on the right things to do in a given situation. So at the end of the day, you see your mind becomes peaceful before going to bed, said Gracelin.

Home Away from Home

Yes, indeed. Our parents correct us when we make mistakes. But don’t you think most people today have smart phones, and even our parents can have facetime with us. It’s not necessarily the owning of bed at home, but after a tiring and a rewarding day, any bed is the best bed to sleep, said Ngainunmawi.

Home Sweet Home

I’m from the Hall. We’re always under the control of others, controlled by seniors, or wardens, etc. But at home, no one controls us, said Feba.

Home Away from Home

Well, Feba said that we are being controlled. It’s not like that. It’s been nearly eight months now since I joined the Hall, shortly going to turn 20. Back at home, no one used to tell me when to cut my hair, dress my nails, how to be properly groomed, etc. Even parents never used to tell us these things. However, our seniors in the Hall tell us that. They give us values - on how to maintain discipline while eating, on respecting elders, etc.

It's insisting, not controlling, said Vasan.

Home Sweet Home

Vasan said he’s turning 20 shortly! I don’t want to seem funny, but let me tell you that, at this age you should have known to do these things all by yourself. It’s self-care! Nothing can beat your mom’s cooking. Everyone in the Hall will agree to what I’m saying! You guys will really miss your mom’s food ain’t you?, asked Megha.

Home Away from Home

Well, as regards mom’s cooking, while I totally agree with what Megha has just said, let me also put across this simple dictum – Absence maketh the heart grow fonder! Ain’t it? It makes us appreciate mom’s cooking even more, ain’t it?

Moreover, those of you day scholars, who stay with your parents, lack a sense of individuality. How do you expect it to be when you go out into the world? You must know how to navigate the world – something that Hall life helps you to a great extent! You can know first-hand, how the system works. It makes you a better person, said Ilfa.

Home Sweet Home

Of course absence maketh the heart grow fonder, but it also makes you worried. You can bond with your family members. Pearlina says I wanted to stay in the Hall, but now I’m a Day Scholar. However, had I lived in the Hall, I’d long to be of support to my mom, to be able to share in the troubles they’re going through, and being with them builds stronger relationships and family bonds. Moreover, we also get to know how to handle them when they grow older, and to treat them with respect, said Catherine.

Home Away from Home

Megha said that, bed is one’s comfort zone! But wait! Isn’t it time we come out of our comfort zones? In school itself you get used to your comfort zones. But at what cost? Let’s remember that, experience is such a vast arena in life. The world is huge. All this experience of the wide world cannot be achieved if you stay put at home. As young adults, there’s a limit to what you can tell your parents. Somethings you share with your parents. However, there are some other things that you cannot share with your parents, which you are quite comfortable sharing with your friends. You explore yourself more when you’re in the Hall, said Keerthana.

Home Sweet Home

This is the point of time, when there’s so much out there in the world and we will be excited about them all, wanting to explore everything that we see! However we have our parents and our neighbours who observe and guard us all the time. They discover even a slight attitudinal change in us, and at some point they will even ask you, ‘What’s wrong with you?’ So yes! Let’s remember the fact that, there’s no rush to experience the world out there, said Kavin.

Home Away from Home

I would like to respond to Catherine’s point. I didn’t go anywhere because of the simple reason that I was worried about my family. Sometimes even I do regret not staying in the Hall. So it’s really a balance. Don’t sacrifice your life. Pursue your interests, said Pearlina.

Home Sweet Home

I live just 15 minutes away from College. I have learnt to be patient and independent. What better way than to be patient with parents? Values need to be fostered. Shauna said that, not all families are the same. Growing with them means understanding them.

When I was in my 10th grade, I wanted to run away from them. But now I feel they are indispensable to my life. I can’t live away from them. I can still be myself when I am around them.

Technology cannot transcend hearts.

At the end of a tiring day, when you get back home, when you have your Amma asking you, ‘Enna da’? (What happened dear?) with such love on her, it melts our hearts. This cannot be done over the phone. Added, I cook for myself, whenever I find the time. I try out a lot of recipes. But in the Hall you can’t! In the process I’ve learnt a lot of new recipes now.

On a closing note, in the Halls, when there’s a conflict it can tend to flare up or get aggravated. However, at home, Trust is more! Judgment is less, said Kirthika.

Moderator’s Remarks: The entire class was high on verve and energy today, contributing their might towards enlivening the debate. The students made sure that they were polite in their counters, dignified in their retorts, and sweet in their disagreements.

Well, that’s the spirit of a typical true blue MCC Debate! I said, signing off on the debate.